listen. listen to me. i know that you and i are swirling around in orbit and i’m just shouting your name into a dial tone. i see you and you don’t know it yet but everything i write is about you. my heart still jumps at your byline and i can tell what you’re whispering underneath that pseudonym. i want to listen when you talk. you’re the most interesting person i’ve ever met. i don’t know if you still laugh like the world is ending but if i came up behind you and handed you my drink would you hold it. i’m too ashamed to tell you i noticed but you’re glowing under these shamelessfluorescents.

i know you’re just joking forgetting who i am but i pretended to have a voice just so i could talk to you, just so you would say my name. if someone ran away from you would you chase them. would you lean over them until your chests touched and would you make them so nervous that they can’t even speak. would your voice crack asking them if they’re okay. i know i’m just joking around pretending to pour my soul but if anyone was listening it would spell out your name. if this is a fantasy no one’s told me yet but does your blood pump faster when i’m here. do the wings on your shoes flutter because you’re ready to run, to follow, to chase. it’s stupid how they all read what i wrote about you but you’ll never know. it’s stupid how i don’t even know if you tried. i’ve never loved anyone before. i know you don’t think i’m here i know you don’t think we talk about you but your name comes up and i miss it.

you wrote your name and i looked for it so i could write mine next to it, loop my letters so they’d be nicer next to yours. if i asked would you fall. i know we’re just swinging from side to side and trying to touch but does your signature change if i’m holding onto it this tightly. does the goblet shrink the more it catches rain. i waited by the benches because i thought if i saw you our worlds would stop but you kept going and running and chasing someone else. my tongue gets longer and longer every year because every year i have more to say about you. i have more to say about how we never really met, how you never really said my name. i give names so much power but the truth is your mouth couldn’t form the word. these metaphors never change, but it’s okay because it’s all about you. do you remember me. i need you to remember me and it’s not fair that you’re so much bigger than my world will ever allow. it’s not fair that you can walk through your world and not even realise how much i remember you.